Public Service Announcement - Hillside Is The Worst Coffee In The United States

So a few weeks ago, I was at a reliable outdoor retailer and found Hillside Self Heating Coffee. There were a variety of flavors, but I figured a French Vanilla Latte would be the safest to try. I thought it would be the perfect addition to my banding trips in the Duluth. After a night in the van, a warm can of self heating coffee would be a great way to start the morning in a cold blind waiting for hawks to fly in.

The instructions told me to remove the seal on the bottom of the can, turn it upside down and then push on the button until the green water disappears. The green water was supposed to go into a part of the can that would heat the coffee. I was curious how the the green water heated the coffee and what was in place to keep it from mixing with the coffee.
From there, I was supposed to put it on a flat (flame proof) surface. Frank didn't seem too excited to have it heat in the blind, so I set it outside to warm up. There's a pink dot that turns white with the coffee is heated. After about ten minutes the pink dot turned white, I opened the top and took a sip. HORRIBLE, AWFUL, ROTTEN, EW! I took another sip just to be sure. HORRIBLE, AWFUL, ROTTEN, EW! I'm not a coffee snob--I'll drink gas station coffee. The only time I found coffee undrinkable was in a tiny town in Utah and I figured it was due to the town's aversion to caffeine...this was worse. I was seriously concerned that some of the mysterious green water that heats the coffee made its way into the coffee.

I wanted to pour the beverage out, but noticed what was on the lid. It practically orders you to drink it from the can (telling you to enjoy it is just asking a little too much). I wondered, were they trying to tell you that it tastes better in the can or that it was a hazard to release out into the world if you don't drink it.

So, for the record, if you come across any Hillside "self heating" beverages--do not go there. Even if it's on clearance and think "what could it hurt?" It'll hurt your tongue's feelings. And I did a little googling tonight and found some interesting blogs about Hillside:

Extinct Beverage Tasting (yeah, it's extinct for a reason).

and

Hillside Coffee and their Hot Cans of Doom (unlike this blogger, I didn't get injured)

and as if that wasn't enough:

An FDA Recall notice:

"REASON
Self-heating cans containing beverages and soups may be contaminated with spoilage organisms or harmful pathogens due to leakage of the can seam."

Hillside is the worst coffee I have ever tasted in my life. I would rather drink coffee (with cream) that has been sitting at room temperature for 48 hours, than ever drink this again. It was so bad, I need a cleansing falcon:

Doesn't this shot of that tundrius peregrine falcon look like a good FaceBook profile shot? It says, "I'm hot but can have a good time and maybe just a little bit of fun wackiness is mixed in!"

Networks: Raptors, Talons, Bird Eaters, Born On The Tundra

Sex: Female

Hometown: Arctic National Wildlife Refuge

Relationship Status: Single

Interested In: tiercels, small ducks and pigeons I can eat, stooping

Looking For: hunting partner, other birds I can eat

Activities: hunting, flying, diving, migrating

Interests: pigeons, teal, nighthawks, flickers, pheasants, starlings, grebes, grackles, blue jays,

Marsh Wren Madness

How about a little cleansing--both figuratively and literally. I've been so busy with the state fair, the RNC, and CivicFest I've barely had time to do some digiscoping. I was able to sneak out for a few hours but felt like my mojo was a little off.

I went birding to a place I use to go to all the time but haven't been to in ages--The Old Cedar Avenue Bridge. I got a reminder why during my outing. There's a trail that's loaded with rails and soras. The above photo is not the best ever photo of a sora, but it certainly is a true to life one--isn't this how you normally see them--shrouded in vegetation. That is, if you see them at all.

The most interesting part of the morning was some odd fluttering I saw on the boardwalk trail. At first I thought it was injured and flailing a bit on the boardwalk but I changed my position and discovered something really cool.

It was a juvenile marsh wren. Check out the little bits of yellow in the corners of its bill.

It had what looked to be a small ant in its bill and it would alternate between preening and stretching out its wings on the boards. I think it was trying to figure out anting. For non birders, anting is something some bird species have been observed doing. Birds take ants and either place them on their feathers or sometimes will lie near an ant mound, allowing ants to crawl on them. It's believed that they acquire defensive secretions from the ants (formic acid) and that it's possibly used as a supplement to the bird's own preen oil.

In this shot, the young marsh wren is totally spread eagled (or should that be spread wrened?) on the boards and is even exposing its preen gland--that's the little pink spot right above the tail. All birds have this, they squeeze it with their bill and excrete oil that is then rubbed all over their feathers. Imagine having a large gland right above your butt that you would squeeze to get some body oil to run through your hair to keep it shiny and strong?

The young marsh wren continued to preen with the wings out, although I couldn't see any more ants around it at this point. It didn't appear to be bothered by me at all, I thought I would try to get a video.

I did, but you can hear me yelling at some bike riders in the background. One of the reasons why I don't go to the Old Cedar Avenue Bridge anymore is that some of the trails are narrow and only meant for foot traffic, but many bike riders like to bring their mountain bikes onto the trail--creating a dangerous situation for both the rider and the hiker.

As I was taking the video of the wren, I saw some bike riders approach. I tried to hold up my hands indicating for them to stop but they didn't understand. I then started saying "No bikes." and explaining the trail rules. However, by the time they stopped, they were right next to the wren and it disappeared into the reeds--doh! I think they thought I was some nutty woman and turned around more to avoid me than to follow the rules of the trail.

They claimed they didn't see this sign that shows this is a hiking only trail.

But, I'm forgetting the purpose of this post: the cleansing of the cute, young marsh wren in its preening glory must out weigh idiots who ignore signs putting themselves and others at risk. Here's a link to the marsh wren video. I recommend clicking on the "watch in high quality" and also hitting the mute button.

Need Cleansing

Some Numb Nut at the Pizza Luce across from our apartment building thought it would be a fine idea to hire a crew to redo their parking lot at 3:30am last night. Non Birding Bill and I were part of a coalition of neighbors coming out to get the crew to stop. Boy, was I the old lady of the group--all the younger neighbors were shouting "This is unacceptable! Call the cops!" or "Dude, I can't believe this, you gotta stop!" (although add a few more colorful metaphors) and I was quoting the city's noise ordinance and shaking my fist.

I must say, the woman who came out to meet the tired/sleepy/irritated/slightly irrational gathering didn't give the best initial answer. When a business has suddenly awakened the neighborhood and angry neighbors come out, the response should be, "Oh wow, dude, I'm sorry, I didn't realize that using noisy paint scraping motorized equipment would be a bad idea in the middle of the night! We'll stop immediately! Oh, and here, why don't I give each of you gift certificates for a free slice for your inconvenience!"

Instead we got, "Uh, well, I didn't hear anything."

We did get them to stop, but I had a fitful night of very little sleep afterwards, couple that with working all day today and packing for Utah and an early flight in tomorrow morning, I'm feeling like a bit of an anti pizza cranky pants. Or, rather, a bit like this:

Okay, I'm having way too much fun with the jumping spider, I'll stop soon, I swear.

I do need some cleansing, so how about a cleansing American redstart (or as NBB calls them, sample sized orioles) who must be nesting near the feeding station in Mr. Neil's yard. Speaking of Mr. Neil, have you seen the baby raccoons he found in his yard (cute!). I know they nest down by the creek, but this one was singing all over the fallen oak and declaring his domain near the feeders.

Breathe in the redstart, breathe out, in, out, in out. Ahhhh. And now for some video:

Dunkin Donuts Broke My Heart

But has probably saved me loads of calories. Sigh.

One of the joys of travel is being able to eat at chains I don't have access to in Minnesota like Chick-fil-A and Dunkin Donuts. I grew up on Dunkin Donuts, I remember my mom's friend Diana coming over on Friday nights with a big box of donuts and pigging out. My favorite being the chocolate or vanilla creme filled donut--a donut covered in powdered sugar and filled with thick, tooth-numbing creme. That was the embodiment of donut to me.

Last summer when I went to Maine for the ABA Convention, I ate at a Dunkin every morning. WildBird on the Fly and I loaded up a bag and feasted on our way to Acadia National Park--it was a gluttonous heaven. Alas, those days are gone...

Being on the East Coast this weekend I knew I would have access to lots of donuts. Dunkin Donuts started in Massachusetts--I would be near the mother land by being Connecticut. My first morning I stopped at a Dunkin and asked for the creme filled donut. They didn't have it. I figured this was just an irregularity, so I stopped at another less than a mile away and learned the awful truth--they have been DISCONTINUED. ARRRRRRRGH!

I was short on time and needed to grab some breakfast so I reluctantly ordered a box of donut holes to eat. They were not as good--they weren't what I was craving and looking forward to, they didn't stand a chance of being tasty to me. I ate a fair share of the donut holes and realized it was silly to waste the calories and decided to share the donuts with some gulls. Hence all the photos of ring-billed gulls eating donuts from my hand in this entry.

I haven't been this angry and bitter since Caribou Coffee discontinued the North Woods Latte (it tasted like liquid French toast, it was yummy) --yeah, Caribou, I'm still upset about that. I quit going there for almost a year when that happened and go only sporadically now.

I'm trying to tell myself this is a good thing, a way of the universe telling me that I've been doing so well by current healthy eating habits, why wreck it now? It's hard enough to eat healthy on the road, so losing this donut access will only allow me to have better choices.

No, I want my creme filled donut!

We passed this car in a parking lot and thought it was a fun cloud of herring and ring-billed gulls surrounding a car. As we started taking pictures, the car left. Are they ashamed that they feed gulls?